Why Decluttering Feels So Damn Personal (and How to Let Go)
Ever start decluttering and end up in a weird emotional standoff with a broken lamp you haven’t used in 7 years?
You might tell yourself:
“But I might fix it one day.”
“I paid $200 for that, I can’t just toss it.”
“It’s not that ugly… maybe in a different room?”
Suddenly, your “quick tidy-up” turns into a soul-crushing guilt spiral.
Sound familiar?
I used to think decluttering was about being ruthless. Just chuck everything and move on.
But that approach left me paralyzed every time I opened a cupboard.
Then I discovered something called the Dissolving Caterpillar Method.
(Yes, weird name. But stick with me.)
What Is The Dissolving Caterpillar Method?
Interior designer Olga Naiman coined this term, and it changed how I think about clutter entirely.
Here’s how she puts it:
“Dissolving is how we let go of outdated identities, unwanted patterns, and low self-worth, in order to step into a more expanded version of ourselves.”
Like a caterpillar liquefying before it becomes a butterfly 🦋
Credit: Photography by French + Tye
How It Actually Works
Here’s Olga’s approach (and why it’s brilliant):
1. Start With The Obvious
If your space is drowning in random papers, wires, broken gadgets, and clothes you know don’t fit, start there.
Removing surface-level clutter calms your nervous system and creates enough breathing room to go deeper.
2. Spot the “Old You” Items
These are the emotional landmines.
Clothes from another life. Decor from a past relationship. Things you’re scared to let go of because they tie you to who you used to be.
Ask yourself:
Would I buy this today?
Do I need to be that version of me anymore?
Am I choosing this over the person I want to become?
Credit: Project AN
3. Handle the Sentimental Stuff
This one’s tough.
Gifts you didn’t like but kept. Objects you feel guilty about discarding.
But here’s the truth:
“Love exists outside of those objects, not within them.” – Olga Naiman
Ask:
Have I ever used this?
Could someone else cherish it more?
Is it part of the life I’m building?
4. Confront Your Beliefs Around Wastefulness
Another reason why we hold onto things is that we don’t want to be wasteful.
But if something is making you feel meh, it might not be worth holding onto it.
Naiman suggests making a list of items you love. How many of your things actually make that list?
Start donating the rest.
Credit: Photography by Molly Culver
Why This Works So Well
Decluttering is rarely about the stuff.
It’s about the emotional friction tied to it.
This method removes the pressure to decide on the spot, breaks the guilt cycle, and creates space before committing.
It’s paced, and that’s what actually works.
👇 Want to learn more? Watch this video on decluttering.
Cheers,
Reynard